So this is to be my first journal entry....how saddening.

I only know a few people here on DA, not too many, and not too well. I am completely addicted to browsing art pieces here, whether it is real life or emotes.

I feel as though I have lost my own inspirations, call it artist's block if you will, or a brain fart.

I am kind of scared of photoshop, and exploring it. I know some of the basics, but I do not push myself to experiment more with it.

I have no clue how to use it, and I see all of the wonderful art here on DA, and I think to myself, how on earth did they do that? How did they even start? HOW DO I BEGIN!!!???

I feel at a loss, my mind is blank. I used to draw with my hand all the time. It wasn't always my own creation, more like say, I see a small tiny picture, and I blow it up, so you can see all the detail. That was one of my favourite things to do as a child.

Then I tried drawing animals, and it looked good, but was not perfect. I tried drawing people, but still something seemed amiss.

Then, I think I just stopped trying. Life got busy, chaotic, depressing, emotional, careless, and I just stopped doing what I loved.

I see all this beautiful art and details, and my heart aches so much to be able to want to learn and understand how to do it.

I just don't know, I feel like a failure. I just can't think, my imagination has seemed to have left me.